Two experts weigh in on how to deal with the issue of biting in preschool-aged children.
In a preschool or daycare environment, daycare providers and preschool teachers may have to deal with the difficult issue of biting.
Firstly, it is important to understand why children bite other children as well as adults.
Dr. Norman E. Hoffman, highly regarded psychotherapist, board-certified mental health counselor, and author of Bad Children Can Happen to Good Parents, provides a sound explanation for the reasons children bite:
“Young children may bite due to frustration, anger, or in an attempt to gain control over another child. The young child may also be feeling powerless or frightened, or he/she may just be overtired”.
Dr. Hoffman also says that in some cases, the child may be making an inappropriate bid for attention from the child care provider, the parents, or from another child.
However, biting normally subsides after the second year. According to Arinoldo, “Once a child turns 3 years old, biting may indicate other behavioral problems, especially if the biting incidents are frequent”.
If biting occurs in a preschool or daycare setting, the adult(s) in charge must be prepared to respond to the situation immediately.
Can biting be prevented?
Dr. Hoffman says, “There is no reliable research that provides us with sound clinical strategies to prevent biting. The “biter” is probably learning to bite form the caregivers and should not be punished in the usual sense”.
Biting cannot be prevented but childcare providers do have control over how they react to the situations in which children bite other children or adults.
Reacting to biting
It is important that the adults involved not react in an emotional manner to biting, warns Dr. Arinoldo. Reacting in an emotionally charged manner may inadvertently reinforce the very behavior that you are trying to eliminate.
Dr. Arinoldo says, “They must use the situation to teach the child that biting is an inappropriate behavior and must not be done. Saying "no biting" firmly at the time of the incident can help”. He also suggests child care providers distract the child and give appropriate attention to the child when the child is not making an inappropriate bid for that attention
Dr. Hoffman also provides sage advice for reacting to biting: “Treat the “victim” and have the biter aid in this process. It should be noted however, the biter should still be firmly but gently instructed that biting “hurts” and it should not continue”.
It is also important that childcare providers then protect the “victim” from future aggressive acts by the biter. Dr. Hoffman also instructs that the biter may have to be separated from all of the children until he or she recognizes the harmful nature of biting.
Both experts agree: Never, ever use “biting back” as a technique to control biting. Never bite a child.
The Bottom Line:
Dr. Arinoldo stresses that it is very important not to let this type of behavior progress. The parents/teachers/providers must address the issue of biting immediately.
Dr. Hoffman’s bottom line: “A quick and consistent response from parents and daycare personnel can help children who bite learn to express their feelings in words so that they can become better able to control their behavior”.
Dealing with biting is a sensitive issue for the children involved as well as those caring for and teaching children, but the way childcare provider reacts is a critical element in controlling biting in the preschool or daycare environment.
When selecting a daycare, find out how they handle the issue of biting. For more information about selecting daycare, see my article How to Select a Daycare Provider.
The copyright of the article Controlling Biting In Daycare in Day Care Behavior Issues is owned by Carla Snuggs. Permission to republish Controlling Biting In Daycare in print or online must be granted by the author in writing.
My son is 4 and we have had 3 incidents of biting the same child at
daycare. His behavior at home is fine, he is around all adults though. I
cannot figure out what is going on, I even had a meeting with the lead
caregiver.
Oct 7, 2008 7:38 PM
Guest :
My 17 month old son has been bitten 8 times in 11 days (I am embarrassed to
even say it). I have talked to the director of the day care place 2 times
already. I can not believe they have not addressed/handled it. I am very
upset.
Oct 22, 2008 1:05 PM
Guest :
That is exactly what we are dealing with! Our 2 1/2 year old does not bite
at home because we have knipped that at the source, but she is consistently
biting at daycare! I don't know what else to tell the daycare, but we
don't find out until weeks later that it has become consistent again.
Please help!!!
Oct 22, 2008 8:01 PM
Guest :
I am a childcare provider who has a consistant biter who I think knows the
behavior is not a good one. Both the parents, myself and the administration
are at a lose at what to do. HELP!!!!!
Jan 22, 2009 7:14 PM
Guest :
My daughter is 15 months, and has frequently been the target of bites at
daycare. Yesterday I picked her up two hours after she had been bitten,
and there was a HUGE imprint of teeth still. I think my baby my have a
scar thanks to it...
Jan 22, 2009 7:14 PM
Guest :
My daughter is 15 months, and has frequently been the target of bites at
daycare. Yesterday I picked her up two hours after she had been bitten,
and there was a HUGE imprint of teeth still. I think my baby my have a
scar thanks to it...
Mar 1, 2009 7:56 PM
Guest :
dont put your child in daycare, that stuff happens. so deal.
Mar 1, 2009 7:59 PM
Guest :
dont put your child in daycare, that stuff happens. so deal.
Mar 4, 2009 8:32 AM
Guest :
I live in CT and thought there use to be a state regulation regarding how a
child care facility handles biting? Any thoughts?
Apr 7, 2009 8:41 AM
Guest :
This article was very helpful. I am an aide at a daycare and I have been
really concerned about hoe my boss and the parents are handling the
incidents. I now know that more action needs to be taken.
Apr 24, 2009 7:40 AM
Guest :
My 15 month old keeps on getting bit too. And they told me it's the same
baby doing it. I really like his daycare but I'm thinking about switching
because I can't stand the thought of sending him to a daycare where he is a
chew toy. If it happens again, I'm just going to have to tell them either
the biter goes or my son does.
Jun 4, 2009 12:24 PM
Guest :
Ok...the "guest" who posted comment on March 1 telling a parent
to "deal..and not to put your child in daycare", you have some
nerve! Some parents don't have a choice! I recently moved my daughter from
a larger pre-school to a smaller, more one-on-one setting with a teacher
who has her master's degree in teaching to introduce her to a foreign
language. She started this past Monday and she was bitten yesterday
(Wednesday) by a 2 1/2 yr old who is the son of a co-worker and I have yet
to receive a phone call to check up on my daughter or for an apology. I
have to work and I have no family here to help with her childcare so I
don't have a choice when it comes to placing her in a childcare setting. I
have been very selective with her childcare and I have NEVER had this
happen before. The teacher was extremely apologetic and I know she has
already addressed the issue with the child but I know the solution to this
problem is the parent's responsibility! I taught my daughter how to express
herself at an early age with sign language and re-direction so the issue of
biting never came up.
Jul 24, 2009 11:37 AM
Guest :
Our daughter has been bitten (twice) a few month, now she is 18 months old
and bit three times. She doesn't do it at home. While we were upset
(didn't overact) when it happened to her, now we are embarrassed .. we will
talk to the daycare director tonight....
Jul 24, 2009 11:39 AM
Guest :
Our daughter has been bitten (twice) a few month, now she is 18 months old
and bit three times. She doesn't do it at home. While we were upset
(didn't overact) when it happened to her, now we are embarrassed .. we will
talk to the daycare director tonight....
Jul 24, 2009 11:41 AM
Guest :
Our daughter has been bitten (twice) a few month, now she is 18 months old
and bit three times. She doesn't do it at home. While we were upset
(didn't overact) when it happened to her, now we are embarrassed .. we will
talk to the daycare director tonight....
Aug 31, 2009 7:51 PM
Guest :
This is in regards to a previous comment that their child has never bitten
anybody and that it's the "parents responsibility". All I can say
is that you must only have 1 child! My first child was perfect, like yours,
never bit anyone. So just wait! What about the biters? My little girl's
class got a letter sent home that if anyone was caught biting they were
sent home for 2 days on the first offense, then 2nd offense expelled from
school. Like you, I DON'T have ANY family and DON'T have a choice but to
put my child in a preschool-daycare. So if my child happens to bite, I
don't know what I'm going to do..It is very hard to explain to a child, who
just turned 2 that biting hurts. So just put yourselves in the
"biter's" parents shoes sometime.
Sep 15, 2009 1:06 PM
Guest :
My son is the biter. Not kids but the teachers. What do I do? He is 4 and
has only biten maybe 20 times since he was 15 months old. They want me to
meet with a behavior specialist to set up an action plan for his behavior.
I understand but still I feel ashamed that he is acting out like this
because he is so very affectinate most of the time. Its his 1st year in
preschool & hasnt really been away from me since he was 15 months old.
Is there a chance tahat it could be seperation issues? Should I just throw
in the towel and pull him out until next year? Maybe with a year at home
agian & 5 he'll do better. Please give some input! Thank You
Sep 27, 2009 1:36 PM
Guest :
I am a child care worker and our policy is that we are not to tell the
parents of the biten child whom is responsible but to fill out an accident
report and have the parents read, sign and state any concerns that they
have. The best first aid for a bite is immediately applying a cold cloth
or ice to the wound, it reduces swelling and in most cases there is no
longer a visable mark on the biten child. If the children are in the
infant or toddler rooms we make sure that their are teething rings to deter
biting. If the child is older we would look into other possible causes;
developmental delays, aggression problems, over or understimulation.
Perhaps a trip to the pediatrician is in order? Biting happens but we must
be sure that it's not recurring or have any underlying causes.
Oct 15, 2009 6:19 AM
Guest :
I have the "biter." This only happens at daycare, he has siblings
at home, plays with other kids his age outside of daycare, and still this
only happens at daycare. YET, I am being warned by daycare this cannot
continue. He is only 20 months old and doesn't talk yet, HOW AM I supposed
to do anything about this?
