Daycare Biting Policies
Informing Parents about Preschool and Childcare Biting Incidents
How to deal with both the biter's and victim's parents and when to get health care professionals involved.
Daycare providers and preschool teachers at some point or another are called upon to handle the behavioral issue of biting, whether the incident is between two children or a child has bitten an adult.
After the adult reacts in a calm manner and gets the situation under control, the adult is then faced with the difficult and delicate task of informing the parents of the victim and the parents of the biter about the incident.
Informing the Biter’s parents
Informing a parent about a child’s unacceptable behavior is difficult in any circumstance. When a child has hurt another child it important to handle the child’s parents delicately, but don’t skirt the issue. it is important that the biters parents be informed of the seriousness of their child’s behavior. But what is the best way to approach a parent in this situation?
Dr. Carl Arinoldo, parenting expert and author of Essentials of Smart Parenting: Learning the Fine Art of Managing Your Children has great suggestions for handling the biter’s parents. Dr. Arinoldo says it is best to ease into the biting issue: “The provider should first discuss all of the good behaviors and/or talents that the child may exhibit. The provider must be very careful not to accuse or place blame directly”.
Next, explain what has already been done to resolve the issue.
“In addition, the provider can ask the parents if the behavior is seen at home and what, if anything, have the parents found helpful in curbing this behavior”, says Arinoldo.
How the child behaves at home is an important issue to observe and discuss, according to Dr. Norman E. Hoffman, highly regarded psychotherapist, board-certified mental health counselor, and author of Bad Children Can Happen to Good Parents, Dr. Hoffman advises, “Perhaps they may be aware of situations that may need to be terminated at home to discourage biting or other aggressive behaviors”.
Dr. Arinoldo suggests that at the conclusion of the talk, the provider should end with something positive about the child in question.
Informing the “Victim’s” Parents
Informing a parent that their child was harmed at daycare or preschool is also a challenge, but must not be avoided. Dr. Arinoldo recommends that the provide parents with details about the about the incident and inform them about the steps taken to resolve the issue. If the issue isn't yet resolved, then the parents should be told how the provider plans to resolve it.
If your facility has a biting policy that protects the child, reminding the parent about the policies you have in place may help ease the parent’s mind.
Biting Policies
Most daycares and preschools have biting policies. This biting policy will not only explain procedural steps for handling biting, but will also explain specific administrative policy with regard to biting incidents. For example, your policy might state that after a child has a second biting incident the child will be removed from the daycare or preschool for one week. After the third biting incident, the child will be removed for two weeks. If a child bites the forth time he/she will be removed indefinitely.
Having a biting policy on place lets parents know that long term biting that goes unaddressed will not be tolerated.
When To Get Professionals Involved
A pediatrician or health care provider should be consulted whenever the biting results in a child's skin being broken of regardless of the age of the child, says Dr. Arinoldo. He warns: “If there is a persistent pattern of biting, an appropriate professional should be consulted, such as a child psychologist or child psychiatrist”.
Additionally, Dr. Arinoldo says that if the child is over the age of three, some consultation is in order.
Parents may need to seriously evaluate their behavior at home, and change more aggressive behaviors to more gentle caring ones, says Dr. Hoffman. “In more severe cases, the biter may have to be referred to a child development expert and additionally be removed from school”.
Dealing with behavioral issues is a challenge, especially when you want to avoid hurt feelings, fear, or frustration. Be firm, but always be honest and direct.
Related Article: Controlling Biting in Daycare
